Category: Motherhood
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The Weight of “Someday”
My entire life has been filled with “somedays.” Someday I would graduate high school and then college, someday I would become a nurse, someday I would have a pretty house, someday I would have my dream wedding, and someday I would be a mother. From a young age, I knew exactly what my life would…
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The Quietest Mother’s Day
Last year on Mother’s Day, I told my husband I hoped to be a mom by the next Mother’s Day. We had just started trying to conceive our first baby and had no idea what the next year of our lives would look like. I was pregnant by the end of July. My dream to…
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What Being “Strong” Really Means to a Bereaved Mom
In the (almost) four months since Nathan was stillborn, people have called me strong, brave, and just about any synonym of those words. They tell me I’m strong for going back to work as a NICU nurse in the hospital where I delivered, brave for sharing my story, and inspirational for waking up every day…
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The In Between: The Community of Loss Moms and the Reality of Motherhood After Stillbirth
Within the first few days after delivering Nathan stillborn, I received a visit from Sam. Sam’s daughter, Selena, was stillborn in 2022 (check out Selena’s Lovies on Facebook!). She asked me if there was anything I wanted or needed to talk about. Sitting on my couch, still heavily bleeding and wearing a postpartum diaper, I…